Chapter 3.3: Discussing Sensitive Topics

According to Feeling Safe: What Girls Say, a 2003 Girl Scout Research Institute study, girls are looking for groups that allow connection and a sense of intimacy and closeness. They want volunteers who are teen savvy and can help them with issues they face, such as bullying and other conflicts (online and offline), peer pressure, dating, sexual harassment (online and offline), academic or athletic performance, eating disorders, alcohol and drug abuse, depression, and more. When Girl Scout activities involve sensitive issues, your role is that of caring adult who can help girls acquire their own skills and knowledge in a supportive atmosphere, not someone who advocates any particular position. Check with your council about which sensitive issues may require additional council support to present and discuss, as well as whether parent/guardian permission is required.

Listen and ask: As the preceding sections suggest, you can help most just by being an empathetic listener. That’s right: Just by listening, you’re helping! Sometimes, you may also find that by asking questions, you can help girls figure out how to get more information and guidance at school or at home. You don’t have to solve their issues, but you can put them on the trail toward solving them.

Arrange for education: If you observe that girls need or want more information on a topic that concerns them, check with your council about opportunities for arranging topical discussions with experts, on areas such as healthy eating, coping with bullies and cliques, and sex education. Every region of the country differs in terms of what families feel is okay for girls to discuss at various grade levels. So do be sure to check in with your Girl Scout council—many councils advise getting parental permission before any planned discussions!

What may seem benign to one person could be a sensitive issue for another, so when you or the girls wish to participate in anything that could be considered controversial (health or education in human sexuality, advocacy projects, work with religious groups, or anything that could yield a political/social debate), put the topic on hold until you’ve obtained written parental permission, on forms available from your council. Included on the permission form should be the topic of the activity, any specific content that might create controversy, and any action steps the girls are to do when the activity is complete. Be sure to have a form for each girl, and keep them on hand in case a problem arises. For non-Girl Scout activities, find out in advance (from organizers or other volunteers who may be familiar with the content) what will be presented, and follow your council’s guidelines for obtaining written permission.

Remember: Don’t feel that you have to solve everything! Your role is helping girls get information from trained people who provide it. And if you’re unsure who to ask to fill this role, count on your council, which has built up relationships with community experts who can help.

Report concerns: There may be times when you worry about the health and well-being of girls in your group. Alcohol, drugs, sex, bullying, abuse, depression, and eating disorders are some of the issues girls may encounter. If you believe a girl is at risk of hurting herself or others, your role is to get her the expert assistance she needs:

• Contact a staff member at your Girl Scout council and find out how to refer the girl and her parent/guardian to experts at school or in the community.
• Share your concern with the girl’s family, if this is feasible.

Here are a few signs that could indicate a girl needs expert help:

• Marked changes in behavior or personality (for example, unusual moodiness, aggressiveness, or sensitivity)
• Declining academic performance and/or inability to concentrate
• Withdrawal from school, family activities, or friendships
• Fatigue, apathy, or loss of interest in previously enjoyed activities
• Sleep disturbances
• Increased secretiveness
• Deterioration in appearance and personal hygiene.
• Eating extremes, unexplained weight loss, distorted body image
• Tendency toward perfectionism
• Giving away prized possessions; preoccupation with the subject of death.
• Unexplained injuries such as bruises, burns, or fractures
• Avoidance of eye contact or physical contact
• Excessive fearfulness or distrust of adults
• Abusive behavior toward other children, especially younger ones